Can't Take My Eyes Off You
by TheGirlInThePinkScarf
Summary: James can't take his eyes off of Jasper. Too shy to make a move, he watches him from afar. What happens when Jasper finally confronts him? One-shot. M for slash and lemon.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I'm back yet again with more James!**

**I decided to use Jasper instead of Emmett for this one because Jasper is a more angst ridden character. (I will of course write more EmmettxJames though)**

**This one-shot is a bit different from my normal style of writing. This is definitely more plot heavy than my usual story. **

**I posted a picture on my profile if you want to know how I pictured Jasper. (I love Jackson Rathbone, but I really wanted to envision a hot blonde for Jasper.)**

**I've always made James a nice character; I wanted to try making James a little more creepy/crazy/disturbed/damaged/stalkerish. **

**Don't worry though I still made him a likeable, sympathetic, and misunderstood character.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or anything associated with Stephenie Meyer's characters. **

* * *

Can't Take My Eyes Off You

James' POV

I know he knows that I watch him. He probably thinks that I'm some deranged killer or something that is waiting for my chance to slash him; he couldn't be further from the truth. I watch him simply because I am utterly fascinated by him. He is masculine, yet beautiful. He has wavy, shoulder length blonde tresses, deep blue eyes, a long straight nose, a perfect mouth and luscious pink lips. I admire this man's beauty from afar 5 days a week. He always looks at me, but he never says anything; we have the perfect relationship. I pray that one day I will have the courage to speak to the nameless blonde angel. My angel actually _does _have a name. My angel doesn't know that I know his name. I _shouldn't _know his name, but I do. I got curious one night and I stealthily followed him home. I was shocked when I saw him go inside of his home and not lock the door. I finally snuck in after about 30 minutes of waiting. The first thing I noticed was the mail on the table and I glanced. My angel's name is Jasper Whitlock.

I know that I should've left, but I just had to see him up close and in better light (I mostly see him at night, but I do sometimes see him during the day). I quietly tip-toed up the stairs and I smiled as I heard my angel snoring. His wavy locks were stuck to his face due to the heat. His sheets were at his ankles and I gasped. He was clad in only a pair of blood red satin boxers. I saw his perfect abs for the first time and I wanted to touch him. I left before I really _did_ touch him. I felt really guilty about being in his house so I never went back after that. It was 11:25 at night and he would be rounding the corner across the street from this park in exactly 3 minutes. I often wonder what kind of job he had that had him coming home at such late hours. It looked like I would get my chance as he crossed the street instead of walking straight like he normally does. My heart is pounding as he gets closer to me. I'm the only one in the park so I'm pretty sure that he's coming to say something to me.

"You've been watching me for 6 months and you haven't said a damn word to me. It's weird and it's fucking creepy, what do you want from me?" Jasper demanded.

I gulped and I froze. I of course thought that he would confront me one day, but I never prepared. What do I tell him? Do I tell him the truth? Do I tell him that I watch him because I think he's beautiful? Do I tell him that I can't take my eyes off of him? Do I tell him that I never say anything or approach him because I'm too shy? Do I tell him that seeing him up close and smelling his cologne is giving me a hard-on? Shit, I have a hard-on! I decide that actions speak louder than words. We're not very far from the bathroom of the park so I push him against the bathroom door and I slowly bring my lips to his. My lips are briefly connected to his before he roughly pushes me away, wiping his mouth. A look of pure disgust crosses his face and my heart is shattered. This is the exact reason that I never wanted to approach him; I ruin everything that I come into contact with. A few tears escape and I look up at him. He is now extremely angry and before I can stop it, his fist connects with my eye. I fall to the ground in pain and that isn't even the worst pain. It's the fact that Jasper runs away from me.

* * *

My broken heart and swollen black eye isn't enough to stop me from going back to the park the next day; I go to the park everyday anyway. It is a beautiful warm and sunny day. I see twin girls running around the park chasing each other and it's the most magnificent thing that I've ever seen and I take a picture. I then take a picture of their mother and father smiling brightly as they watch the two girls. I am so wrapped up in snapping pictures that I jump when I feel someone tap me on my shoulder. My heart stops beating when I realize that it's Jasper. It's daylight and there's a park full of people so I know that he's not planning to harm me, but I can't stop the fear that I am currently feeling. My palms are sweaty and I am shaking. Jasper places his hand on my arm and I stop shaking immediately. He sighs and he doesn't look at me. I notice his gaze is on the twin girls that I just finished taking pictures of. He smiles brightly before turning his attention to me. I notice he has a plain white paper bag in his hands and I am going to ask what's in it when he finally breaks the silence.

"Look, I'm really sorry about last night. I would like to apologize…" Jasper trails off and I realize that he wants to know my name.

"James," I answer and Jasper nods.

"I'm sorry that I gave you a black eye James. I got about 2 hours asleep because I kept thinking how much of a dick that I was. You should put some ice on your eye and take this for the pain," Jasper says and he hands me the bag.

"Thank you Jasper. I'm sorry as well. I know better than to just kiss a stranger like that," I apologize sincerely.

"You _should_ be sorry for that…especially because you kissed a very heterosexual stranger. Wait, how do you know my name?" He asks with a raised brow.

"Oh, um…" I trail off trying to think of an excuse.

"I have to get back to work. Maybe we can get a cup of coffee or something when I get off. There's this place 2 blocks from here that I like," Jasper suggests.

"You don't have to do that. Thanks for the ibuprofen though," I kindly thank him and turn my attention back to the laughing twins.

"I owe it to you. Be here at your normal time, ok?" I nod at Jasper's request.

"Ok, I'll see you at 11:28," I say before I can sensor what comes out of my mouth.

I expect him to make a comment about how creepy it is that I know _exactly _what time that I see him. He shocks me by smiling and laughing instead. I watch him as he runs across the street and disappears from my sight. I have so many emotions going on that I don't know what to think. He clearly stated that he was heterosexual, so we are going out as acquaintances I guess. It's an overwhelming feeling. I'm just excited that I _finally_ get to know the man behind that beautiful blonde hair and those dark blue eyes. 11:28 cannot come quickly enough.

* * *

As usual, Jasper comes into view at exactly 11:28. He even laughs while pointing at his watch as he crosses the street. We start walking side by side and a surprisingly _not _awkward silence surrounds us. His arm occasionally brushes mine and my heart skips a beat. After walking for about 5 minutes, we arrive at the coffeehouse. I open the door for Jasper and he thanks me. We both order the same drink; a hot white chocolate, I order a sugar cookie as well and he orders a brownie. The place is pretty much empty so we take a seat at the first available table that we see. We sip our drinks for a few minutes and Jasper's eyes meet mine. His expression is curious, his dark eyes gleaming. He takes a bite out of his brownie and my eyes are glued to his mouth. He says something, but I don't quite hear him. It's at this moment I tell myself that if I have any chance of making a good impression I better stop daydreaming.

"I'm sorry, what did you say?" I ask, still slightly dazed.

"I asked how do you know my name," He repeats and I sigh.

"You have to promise to not leave or call the police if I tell you," I deepen my voice to let him know that I'm serious.

"Um, ok. I promise," Jasper sincerely replies.

"One day a few months ago I followed you home and I saw some of your mail," I confess.

"You were in my house? Did you snoop or steal anything?" He asks and I frown.

"No! I just looked at your mail to know your name and I left," I tell him my edited version of the events. I don't want to scare him off by telling him I spied on him while he was sleeping.

"Normal people ask someone if they want to know his name, they don't sneak into people's homes," Jasper snaps and I nod.

"I know and I'm sorry. I felt really bad after doing it so I didn't do it again," I explain and Jasper seems to believe me.

"So why are you always at that park anyway? Are you homeless? Shit! I'm really sorry, I didn't mean to ask that," He apologizes and reddens from embarrassment.

"It's ok. I guess you didn't notice the camera earlier. I'm a photographer. I love to take photos outside and the park and the areas around here are so beautiful. I go there at night because I don't like to go home. I started coming to the park later once I started watching you…" I trail off, not wanting to scare him again.

"It didn't bother me that you would watch me. It would bother me that you wouldn't say anything. I had no idea what you wanted from me. I didn't know if you wanted to kill me, rape me, I thought maybe you were hired by my ex girlfriend to spy on me or something," Jasper comments and we both laugh.

"You probably wouldn't believe that I'm shy considering I kissed you yesterday, but I am. I think everything is prettier and better from afar. I thought I would view you like that. But even now, I find it hard to take my eyes off of you," I admit and he blushes.

"So it's safe to assume that you're gay, right?" He raises his eyebrow at me.

"Did the pink shirt tip you off?" I answer sarcastically and he laughs.

"I don't want you to think that I'm homophobic or anything. I don't want you to think that I'm violent either. You just caught me off guard is all," Jasper explains.

"You had every right to punch me. You got kissed by a stranger, it was dark and at a secluded park. If I was a weirdo, I would have done a lot worse," I counter.

"It was wrong because if it was a girl that would have kissed me, I wouldn't have reacted like that. It was a cheap shot too, it's not like I felt threatened by you. This may sound odd, but somehow I knew that you weren't going to hurt me. That's why I felt like shit when I calmed down and thought about my actions," Jasper explains as he looks into my eyes.

"I thought you were the most attractive guy that I'd seen in a long time and that's why I started watching you. Everything from your walk to the way your hair blows in the wind fascinates me. Because I'm a photographer I can appreciate art and beautiful things, and that's exactly what you are," I sigh as I finish complimenting him.

"You've wanted to say that for a long time, haven't you? You've had all of your feelings bottled up for 6 months; you must feel a lot better," He says.

"You have no idea. If you don't mind me asking, why do you work such weird hours?" I ask, trying to change the subject.

"I'm a pharmacist. I got a pretty sweet deal on that ibuprofen that I gave you earlier," He jokes and we both laugh.

"I can't believe you're still sitting here. I'm surprised you haven't run away screaming yet," My voice is sad as I think about the possibility of him running away from me again.

"I'm not afraid of you and I don't think that you're crazy. I find you quite interesting actually. I guess in a way I'm oddly fascinated with you as well," Jasper confesses and I'm the one blushing now.

Not wanting to ruin the moment with my big mouth I decided to finish my hot white chocolate, which is actually now cold and eat my sugar cookie. His beautiful hair is in his face and I've never wanted a rubberband or ponytail holder so bad before. I have the feeling he's hiding behind his hair, but I just want to see his face and read his expressions. Jasper yawns and I suggest walking him home. He then surprises me by asking me if I live nearby and that he wants to walk me home. I tell him that I live a block away from the park and we quickly throw away our trash and start walking. Afraid that I'll say something to push him away, I'm mostly silent. It's after we've walked for 10 minutes that I get curious.

"I know that you work pretty close to your home, but don't you have a car?" I inquire.

"I don't drive anymore. Plus, I enjoy walking," Jasper answers and I think of something else to say. I have the feeling there's more to that statement.

"I used to walk with—" I cut myself off by clearing my throat and trying to hold back my tears.

"Are you alright?" Jasper questions, truly concerned.

"I'm fine, I was just thinking of a painful memory," I explain.

"Cars bring up painful memories for me too so I understand completely," He sympathizes.

"Well, we're here. This is my home," I nervously state.

"It's nice," Jasper states and I can tell that he's nervous as well.

"I was just wondering. Can I give you a kiss? Not on the lips, just a peck on the cheek," I clarify and I hold my breath.

"Um… I guess that would be ok," He answers after a short pause.

I can't believe that he said yes. I calm myself down before I walk closer to him. I'm so close that I can hear him breathe and I can smell his intoxicating scent. We're about the same height; he's maybe an inch taller than me. I stare into those gorgeous eyes of his and I see uncertainty, but trust at the same time. I place an unruly blonde wave behind his ear and he shivers at my touch. I gently place my hand on his chin to lift his head up so he's looking at me. I close my eyes and I press my lips to his cheek. I pull away quickly and I smile and open my eyes. It may have only been a kiss on the cheek, but it felt so intimate and sweet. I thank Jasper for trusting me and he invites me out for coffee (hot milk chocolate actually) again on Saturday, his day off. I gladly accept and I walk into my house. My house doesn't seem as gloomy and depressing anymore. _I _don't feel as sad and depressed anymore.

* * *

It's been two weeks since Jasper and I had our "man date" on Saturday. We hang out as just friends pretty much every night and it doesn't bother me. I would of course like to be more than friends, but I'm satisfied by just having someone like Jasper in my life. We're sitting at was has been dubbed "our" table at the coffeehouse. Jasper's reading the paper and I'm reading some book about a vampire love story. I put my book down and just stare at Jasper while he's reading. He has on the cutest glasses and he looks to be deep in thought. Jasper doesn't even freak out when he catches me staring at him anymore; I even catch him watching me sometimes out of the corner of his eye. My smile and happy mood fades quickly.

"Shit!" I curse and I catch Jasper's attention.

"What's wrong?" Jasper asks as he folds his paper.

"Some guys that I've known since high school just came in. They've been torturing me since high school. I don't want to deal with them right now; I think we should go," I suggest.

"We're not going anywhere, we were here first. Just ignore those assholes," He tells me, but I shake my head.

"You don't understand—" I stop talking as I see 2 of my enemies approach me.

"Long time no see, James. Did we interrupt you two girls having a tea party?" Edward mocks.

"It's not what it looks like. We're not on a d—" Jasper notices my hurt expression and he stops talking abruptly.

"I should've known. I guess nothing has changed since high school. You still can't get any dick," Laurent teases and I try to keep my cool.

"That's not true. James actually did find some demented person that actually liked him, maybe even loved him. God recognized his mistake though and took that person away from him," Edward smiles when he realizes that his words have caused me to cry.

I don't want Jasper to see me in my current state so I run out of the coffeehouse. Not feeling well, I sit on a nearby bench and I cry like I hadn't cried in 8 months. I'm trembling and shivering as the tears keep falling from my eyes. It's hard to breathe and I feel like I'm being choked. I feel someone rubbing my back trying to calm me down and I know that it's Jasper. I cry harder knowing that he's witnessing me in a moment of pure weakness. Breathing is getting harder and I'm trying to tell him that the pain is too much and that I can't deal with it anymore. He shushes me and he wraps his warm arms around me and he holds me securely. I continue to try to talk, but the only noises that I can make are ragged pants.

"Shh, don't try to talk. I need you to calm down, ok? Take deep breaths and try to relax," He instructs me, but I can't comply.

I can faintly hear his voice, but I can't make out the words. I can barely see and I feel dizzy. A wave of nausea so strong hits me, but I will myself to not vomit on the angel that's holding me and trying to get me to calm down. Jasper's still talking, but his words sound muffled. He stands up and I think he's asking me to do the same. I'm too weak, too tired, I can't move. Once he realizes that I can't move, I feel his arms around me and I think that he's carrying me. I try to open my eyes to see what's going on, but I can't. Sleep is calling and I can't refuse it.

* * *

I open my eyes and I realize that I'm not at my house. I walk out of the strange room and I go to the bathroom. I notice a few magazines in the bathroom and I see they have Jasper's name on them. How the hell did I end up at Jasper's house? I knock on the door to Jasper's room and I walk in when I don't hear anything. I don't see him around, but I notice a note that's on his bed. I shake my head; even this man's handwriting is beautiful. It's beautiful cursive that looks like it was written with a quill. I pick up the note and I read it.

_James,_

_I decided to bring you to my house since it was closer than yours. I also thought that you could use a friend and didn't need to be alone._

_I don't work on Sundays, but they called me and asked if I wanted to do a few hours of overtime and I said yes._

_I should be back by 1:45, make yourself at home and get comfortable._

_There's plenty of food to eat and you can pick anything out of my closet to wear._

_I hope that you feel better and I'll see you soon_

_There's pain medication in my medicine cabinet in the kitchen if you're in any pain._

_~Jasper_

I smile at Jasper's note. I don't remember a thing that happened last night and I'm a little thankful for that. I'm pretty hungry and I have a terrible migraine so I make myself a few pancakes and take some ibuprofen. I look in Jasper's closet and I pick a random pair of jeans and a light blue polo. I take a quick 15 minute shower and I walk into Jasper's room to get dressed. I'm scared shitless when I see that Jasper is back. I look at the clock and it's 1:55. He notices my lack of clothing and we both blush at the same time. Thank God I decided to at least wear a towel.

* * *

Jasper's POV

James is dripping wet and I can't help but stare at him. I'm not staring at him in an 'I think he's hot' kind of way, but in an admiring, complimentary kind of way. I can tell he notices that I am staring at him because of the blush and smile that's on his face. After a few minutes of just staring him in the eyes I decide to leave and give him some privacy. He tells me that I can come back in my room 5 minutes later. I sit next to him on my bed and he blushes a deep crimson and I can't help but laugh. I swear he blushes like a bashful girl. We both talk at the same time.

"I'm sorry," We both apologize before laughing.

"I wasn't paying attention to the time when I got in the shower. I didn't know that you would be here," James explains and I pat him on the back.

"It's cool. It's not like you were completely naked or anything," We both blush at my statement.

"Thank you for bringing me here. I honestly don't remember anything that happened last night," James says.

"It's cool. Some assholes walked into the coffeehouse and one of them, the bronze haired one said something that made you cry," I explain to him and he weakly nods.

"I remember now. I think I had like a panic attack or something like that afterwards," He remembers.

"Yea, something like that. Do you want to talk about it?" I ask softly.

He looks at me and all that I can see is pain and torment in his eyes. He starts to shake and cry again. Shit! I'm going to kill him and all I want to do is help him. I'm not exactly sure why but it really tore me up to see James in his fragile, vulnerable state last night. James and I have grown close in the past few weeks and I can honestly say that it would affect me if something happened to him. He's holding me tightly as he cries hysterically. I take my shirt off since it's soaked and I just hold him like I did last night. I caress his cheek and I tell him that everything is going to be ok. He wipes his tears and he pulls away from me. He takes a few deep breaths and he faces me when he is as calmed down and relaxed as he can possibly get.

"His name was Emmett," James chokes out.

"I'm listening, James. Keep talking," I urge him.

"He was my first love, he was my everything. He was the first and only person to ever truly love me. He was such an amazing man. He was strong, but gentle, he was funny, sweet; he was a lot smarter than people thought. He was my world, my rock; he was truly my other half. We were so happy together, our life was great, perfect even, we had our whole lives planned out," He pauses and he grabs my hand.

"What happened?" I ask, truly curiously.

"He was diagnosed with prostate cancer. It happened so randomly and so suddenly. I had to watch the man of my dreams, my Romeo; I had to watch him die. Part of me died when he died. No one will ever love me the way that he did. I fell apart when he died. That's why I don't like to be home at night. There are so many memories of him and they haunt me. I miss him so much Jasper," He's crying by the time he finishes talking and so am I.

"Jasper? Are you ok?" He asks frantically.

"I know what you're going through. There's a reason that I don't drive. My fiancée Victoria and I were driving home from a party one night. I drove because she was drunk. I never drank when I went out with her because she loved to take shots and have a good time. I accidentally ran a red light and Victoria's side of the car got hit by a truck. She was a fighter. She didn't die instantly, but I knew that she was going to. I thought my life was over when she passed too. I started dating and having sex with any girl that I could pick up. I tried everything to try to dull the pain," I confess and I look at James for his reaction.

James is staring at me with his tear stained face and big blue eyes. He leans closer to me and I know exactly what he wants to do; I don't stop him for a reason unknown to me. His lips are suddenly on mine and I'm not protesting. I wrap my arm around his neck, pulling him closer to me as he straddles me. My hands are running through his short brunette hair and my eyes are closed. My eyes open when James stops kissing me and my lap feels lighter. I look and James is right next to me and he looks extremely petrified and ashamed.

"I'm sorry. I wanted to stop before I did something that we would both regret. I didn't want you to think that I was taking advantage of you or anything," James explains and I nod.

"We both just got caught up in our emotions, it's no big deal. Thanks for caring so much about me and about my feelings," I look him right in the eyes as I thank him.

"We should both take a nap. I'm beyond exhausted," James suggests as he gets up and heads for the door.

"Where are you going?" I ask as I pull the sheets back and pat the spot right next to me.

"Are you um… asking me to sleep with you?" James blushes deeply as his question leaves his mouth.

"I guess I am. Come on," I encourage.

I get off of the bed to quickly undress. I take off my shirt, shoes and my khakis; I'm left wearing a pair of plain black boxers. I notice James staring at me and I playfully hit him and tell him to stop ogling my package. James then takes off his clothing until he's left in nothing but a pair of dark gray boxers. I quickly look at his face after I discover the bulge in his boxers. He tries to cover it up and he's frantically looking for the jeans that he just took off and I can't help but chuckle. His whole face and neck turn scarlet as he tries to put his jeans back on.

"It's ok James. I'm kinda flattered in a way," I admit.

I get in the bed and James follows me. Because of his "condition" he turns his back to me. I haven't had anyone next to me in my bed since my ex girlfriend Alice left me and that was several months ago. It feels good to have someone next to me. Without thinking, I close the gap between us and before I know it, I have my hands wrapped his waist securely. James turns around halfway and he looks at me with a confused expression on his face. He doesn't look mad or upset so I decide to explain myself.

"I just haven't had anyone in my bed in a while. I guess I just needed someone to hold on to. Knowing that you're here with me reminds me that I'm not alone," I whisper and I avoid James' gaze.

"You're never alone as long as I'm here. You don't have to hold me in order to keep me here; I will be here for as long as you need me, ok?" James' voice is soft and genuine.

When I look up at him, I see his blue eyes do not deceive him. I can almost _feel _the emotions coming off of him; sincerity, love, adoration, and of course lust. James looks at me in a way that no one has since Victoria and it warms my heart. Not caring that James is my friend and that he's a guy, I lean forward and I kiss him. The kiss is sweet, but certainly not innocent. I interlace our hands as I deepen the kiss. I close my eyes at the sensation. Suddenly, the only thing that seems to matter is James. James has been the light in my life. He's the reason that I smile. This kiss feels right, it feels _beyond _right. It feels like we're connected. I finally break the kiss and I thank him…for everything. He soon drifts off to sleep and I just watch him. He looks so angelic, serene and so beautiful. I kiss him softly on his forehead. I want to go to sleep because my body craves it, but I just can't take my eyes off of him.

* * *

It's been 6 days since the day that James slept in my bed; albeit a very awkward 6 days. I'm not really sure whose fault the awkwardness is. We've seen each other and went out for drinks since that day, but it wasn't the same as before. I was more than relieved when James called me after I woke up this morning and invited me out for dinner. He never mentioned the word date, but I'm pretty sure that's what he meant. I am certainly going to treat tonight like a date and see if the awkwardness is still there. James, being the sweetheart that he is invited me to this Italian restaurant that's in walking distance since he knows how I feel about cars. Our date is in 2 hours and I still haven't decided on an outfit. I open my closet and a familiar scent hit my nose; the smell of Victoria's perfume. I never threw away any of her clothes and they're neatly folded on the top shelf. I grab a few of her clothing items and inhale.

It's a bittersweet scent; a mouthwatering scent that I will never grow tired of, and a scent that I will never smell mixed with Victoria's natural aroma. I hadn't thought about Victoria to the point of hysteria and tears in a while before I told James about her. I wonder what Victoria would think of James and I. Would she be disgusted that I was possibly falling in love with a man? I look up and at that _precise_ moment, a white button down shirt falls from my top shelf into my lap. I gasp when I realize _what _shirt fell down; it was the last gift that I'd ever received from Victoria. I haven't looked at this shirt since she died. The shirt was still in the box, how the hell did it fall down? Not wanting to question it any further, I decide that I'm going to wear the shirt. I look out of the window and I see that it suddenly stopped raining and there's a beautiful rainbow in the sky. I smile as I remember there was a rainbow identical to this one on my first date with Victoria.

I clean up the mess I made with Victoria's clothes, grab a pair of pants and I close my closet. I look at my watch and I only have an hour and a half to get ready. I take a quick shower, brush my teeth and get dressed. Since I've been wearing my hair in a ponytail lately, I choose to wear it down and have it falling into my face. Once I decide that I look satisfactory, I grab a jacket, my wallet and I leave my house. I arrive at James' place just in time. He has just locked his front door and he turns around to face me. We both smile warmly at each other and he kisses me on both cheeks and chastely on the lips. He grabs my hand and we start walking. After walking for about 10 minutes, we finally reach our destination. James explains to me that he got a last minute reservation and that this restaurant is very popular. The flowers surrounding our table are very beautiful and I notice that they're lilies; Victoria's favorite flowers.

"You look nice," I compliment James.

"Thanks, so do you," James replies.

"This is the first time that we've gone out and are actually going to eat real food," I point out and James chuckles.

"I was going to cook dinner for you, but then I remembered that I can't cook. I think that a romantic dinner is exactly what we need," He explains and there's a glint in his eyes.

Our waitress comes before I can respond. James surprises me once again when he orders both of our meals in fluent Italian. I can tell the waitress is quite impressed and pretty charmed by James as well. I almost want to tell her to stop batting her fake eye lashes, but I am too jealous to speak. I'm not jealous of _her _necessarily, but I'm jealous that maybe there are other guys that see in James the same things that I see. Do I really have a right to be jealous though? I take a sip of water and I clear my throat. James raises his eyebrow at me, letting me know that I have his undivided attention.

"You don't have to answer this question if you don't want to, but I was just wondering if you um…I don't know, maybe, perhaps…" I just stop talking as I start to sweat profusely.

"You can ask me anything, you don't have to be nervous or embarrassed," James encourages as he places his hand on top of mine.

"I know that I probably have no right to feel possessive of you, but I can't help it. The thought of you being with another guy…well let's just say that I don't like it. So have you been with a guy since we started hanging out?" My voice is barely above a whisper.

"Are you serious? Do really think that I would? Don't you know how I feel about you?" James doesn't sound angry, he sounds hurt.

"Of course I do. I know that you like me a lot—" James cuts my sentence off.

"No. I do not 'like you a lot' Jasper Taylor Whitlock, I love you," He says out loud for the first time.

That damn waitress comes at an inopportune time again. She brings us our drinks and tells me that they ran out of one of the ingredients for my dish. I tell her that I still want the dish and she walks away. James is absentmindedly sipping his drink like he didn't just tell me that he loved me. Sure I thought that he loved me, but it's so different actually hearing it. I try to get him to look at me, but he won't. I open my mouth to speak, but nothing comes out. It's probably a good thing too because I would probably say something unintelligent. Our food is brought to us 20 minutes later and we eat in silence. I pay for our food and we walk out of the restaurant wordlessly. We round a corner and I gently push him up against an apartment building.

"You can't tell someone you love them and then not say anything," I tell him and he looks at me perplexed.

"Isn't that _my_ line? What did you expect _me _to say?" James asked a bit callously.

"Damn it, James! I'm falling for you…hard. I'm new to this, ok? I don't know what the hell I'm doing! I'm going to mess this up; I'm going to ruin this somehow. Don't let me ruin this," My voice is almost inaudible as I finish talking.

"I feel like I ruin everything, too. But I _won't_ let either one of us mess this up. I've wanted this for too long to let either one of us fuck up," He says and he wipes the tears that I didn't even know started to fall.

"Let's go to your place," I suggest.

* * *

James' POV

As I unlock the door to my house I remember that it's the first time that Jasper is going to see the inside. I sigh as I invite Jasper into my home. Jasper is captivated by all of the pictures that are in my living room. They're all photographs that I have taken, some are of family, friends, nature, and things that I think look interesting. There's one picture in particular that he's fixed on though; a picture of Emmett and I. I couldn't part with the picture because we're holding his niece Rosalie and we're both kissing her on each of her newborn cheeks. Jasper looks at me and he smiles brightly.

"That is probably the most magnificent picture that I've ever seen. He was beautiful," Jasper compliments sincerely.

"It's the only picture of us that's not painful for me to look at. We can go upstairs if you want," I offer and Jasper nods.

We walk upstairs and I stop right in front of the door to my bedroom. My hand is on the handle and it's shaking. I explained to Jasper a few weeks ago that I hadn't been in my room since Emmett died. I pretty much cleaned it out and started sleeping in the living room or guest room (I didn't sleep the first few months after he passed). Jasper removes my hand from the doorknob and he kisses it. He's whispering that it's ok and that I don't have to open the door and let him in. He kisses me sweetly and suggests that we go downstairs and watch a movie.

"6 hours before he died he told me that he wanted me to be happy and to find someone. I've found my someone. I can do this," I announce as I open the door to my bedroom.

The room looks as if someone just moved in or moved out. There are boxes taped up and garbage bags all over the room. The holes in my walls are visible, it's clear that I took down some pictures. The only source of color is the baby blue curtains. My bed looks lonely. There's one black pillow and only black sheets on the bed. My nightstand is also bare. I think that I will redecorate the room someday. I have a few pictures that I took of Jasper that I can hang on the naked walls. I lay down on the bed and Jasper joins me. I turn so that I'm facing him.

"I haven't been with anyone since he died. He was the dominant one in our relationship too, so if I'm not very good—" He puts his finger to my lips to silence me.

"It'll be great because you care, it'll be great because you love me and you won't hurt me," Jasper reassures.

I tell him to get dressed and that I'll be back. I go into the guestroom and I search in the drawers until I find a condom and some lube. I go back into my room and the sight in front of me is breathtaking. Jasper is completely nude, semi-erect and on my bed. I am _definitely _going to have to do something about Jasper being only semi-erect. I throw the condom and lube on the bed before frenetically stripping my clothes off. Soon, I'm just as naked as I was the day I was born. I kiss Jasper sensually on his lips and then I move my kisses down his neck and chest. His eyes are closed and he's moaning and it's driving me insane. I play with his nipples as my kisses get lower and lower. He stiffens when I very lightly run my hand up and down the length of his cock.

"James!" Jasper moans.

I continue to tease him until he's fully erect. I teasingly lick the underside of his shaft and Jasper shudders. My hands start stroking his shaft as I put just the head into my mouth. I lick and suck on it as I move my hands faster. I remove my hands as I start to place more of him into my mouth; soon all 7.5 inches of him is deeply buried in my mouth. I slowly bob my head up and down his length and Jasper continues to moan. He places his hand on the back of my head to guide my movements and I moan with him still in my mouth. The vibrations drive him crazy. He's fucking my mouth at a fast pace and I can tell that he's close. His grip on my hair tightens and his whole body is flushed. I lube two of my fingers while still sucking him. He's slightly relaxed so my finger slips inside of him effortlessly. His eyes pop open as I move my finger deeply inside of him. His grunt is a sign that I can add another finger.

"I'm gonna cum, honey!" He warns.

I add a second finger and I gently stretch him; moving my fingers in a scissoring motion. I can tell when I find his prostate because he lets out a cry that I'm sure my neighbors can hear. He tries to move my head, but I suck harder as he explodes into my mouth. His body is writing as he delivers a thick load of cum down my throat. I remove my mouth once I feel him soften in my mouth. I do not however stop moving my fingers inside of him. He places one of his hands on top of mine to slow my thrusting. I add another finger and he gasps from the pain. I kiss him passionately and tell him to relax. He instantly relaxes and I remove my fingers after a few more thrusts. He opens the condom and puts it on for me.

"I'm going to go as slow as I can, but you have to tell me if I'm hurting you," I say and he nods.

I lube the condom and I kiss him as I enter him. The head slips in a little easier than I thought it would and I gauge Jasper's reaction. His eyes are closed and he's biting his lip so I push a few more inches inside of him. He asks me to stop briefly and I oblige. He squeezes my ass, pulling me deeper into him and we groan simultaneously. After a few more minutes I'm fully inside of him. I'm still moving slowly because I don't want to hurt him. He opens his eyes and he says the one word that I was desperately waiting for, "please." I pull all of the way out and I roughly push back in. I stop because I don't know if his expression is one of pain or pleasure. My confusion is gone when Jasper gives me a simple request.

"Do that again," Jasper whispers hoarsely.

I plunge deeply inside of him and he curses when I stimulate his prostate. I kiss him fervently and he whimpers in my mouth. I'm sweating and I'm panting; I'm getting so close to cumming. I don't want to reach my peak without Jasper though. I pound into him more forcefully, and the only sounds in the room are of flesh hitting flesh and our cries of pleasure. I announce my pending release and I tell Jasper that I want him to go with me. He starts furiously beating his cock and he moans raucously as he cums. He clamps down tightly around me that triggers my orgasm as well. I fall on top of him and I pull out of him. I kiss him before telling him that I'll be right back. I get up to dispose of the condom and I grab a wet towel for Jasper. He smiles as he starts to clean himself off. When he's finished he lays on my chest and we both concurrently sigh in contentment. I rub Jasper's back soothingly.

"Best orgasm of my life," My statement breaks the comfortable silence that surrounds us.

"Best _two _orgasms of my life," Jasper adds and we laugh.

"This room doesn't bring back painful memories for me anymore. I think that we can create some wonderful memories in here and all over my house," I remark and Jasper smiles.

"I have a feeling that we're going to be making wonderful memories here, at my place, at the coffeehouse…" He trails off as we break out into a fit of laughter.

Jasper rests his head back on my chest and he starts to snore soon; a sound that I can definitely get used to. I kiss him on his forehead and I whisper into his ear that I love him. He starts talking in his sleep and I think I hear him mumble something that sounds close to "I love you too." My angel sleeping peacefully on top of me is the most beautiful visual in the world. I try to tear my eyes away from him and close my eyes so I too can get some sleep. I guess some things never change because I _still _can't take my eyes off of Jasper.

* * *

**A/N: I know that this was long, but I hope that you enjoyed it!**

**I also know that it wasn't the best lemon that I've ever written, but hopefully it was ok.**

**Review and tell me what you think! **


	2. Update!

A/N: It's been so long since I've written this story; I've written so many more since I completed this one.

Anyway, I was just coming to tell everyone that I now have a blog for my fan fictions.

I have some additional information about this story and a little information about adding a few scenes or a chapter.

The link to my blog is on my profile (it's the second blog link), but if you don't feel like going to my profile here's the direct link: http:/thegirlinthepinkscarffics(.)blogspot(.)com/2011/04/cant-take-my-eyes-off-you(.)html

You just have to remove the parentheses when you copy and paste the link.

I hope I see some of you there!

-TheGirlInThePinkScarf


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